Stages of grief & lust for life

Elisabeth — Sun, 17 Jul 2022 15:32:34 +0000

Stages of grief & lust for life

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Yesterday around noon it was three years ago my dad gave out his last breath. ⁣

That last week with my father was one of the best gifts he gave me. ⁣

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It connected me fully with my presence. ⁣

Being so near to death reminded me how much I LOVED life. ⁣

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At that time, three years back, the foundation under my marriage had completely been swept away We where busy figuring out what route to take next. ⁣

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Sometimes I felt incredibly brave. ⁣

I knew what I wanted and I boldly took action by following my gut feeling and my intuition.

On other times… not so. ⁣

The deeply hidden insecurities from my inner child raised their heads and asked to be recognized. ⁣

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That last week with my dad stopped all that. My husband and I where one again, and I also felt how powerful I was on my own.⁣

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The clarity of where I was needed the most was like a healing balm for my wandering soul. ⁣

It was a very simple and grace filled task; be there for my dad in the last phases of his life. ⁣

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While I grieved for my dad’s passing, his last resonance with me was one of pure delight of no longer having to carry the burden of his suffering body. ⁣

The freedom of his soul and the happiness I witnessed in him when he crossed over filled my heart with so much gratitude. ⁣

And I also received a message back for me, as a spectator, that I only can describe as being initiated with a holy ‘lust for life’. ⁣

A loving reminder how much this life of mine was worth, how worthy my soul was, and to just choose and create a life that I loved and would fulfil me.⁣

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After the the funeral and the weeks that followed I turned back to that message.⁣

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Inside of the grieving was a huge energy source. The letting go phase, the anger, the sadness of all things changing and nothing being permanent, it made me realize it also meant I was free to create completely new outcomes. ⁣

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Not being bound by the rigidity of expectations! What freedom! What opportunity!⁣

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I found a deeper connection with my body’s wisdom by opening up and increasing my life force. ⁣

Of course, I sang more, but also went deep into the well of wisdom from Shakti movements, Dakini initiation’s, happier sexuality, awakening sensuality, to way more tuning into my own divine feminine wisdom. ⁣

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I consciously moved through layers of anger, frustration, pain, sadness, lust, funniness, playfulness and connected with a holy awareness of my soul. ⁣

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It helped me to create space for the many parts of my being I had never invited before to be heard and seen. ⁣

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Grieving gave me a bit of a “fuck it” mentality. Let’s just do this. The dying thing is real as it get’s. Let’s not waste any more time by living life to other peoples rules. ⁣

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There have been more phases in my grieving than I can share. It also coincided with a dark night of the soul, a void, and slowly a realization that life will never be the same. ⁣

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To be honest, I’m so happy now it will always be different.⁣

This beautiful adventure of life, who REALLY wants to know how life exactly will looks like in 20 years?⁣

Not me.⁣ ⁣

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When I sat on the rocks at the sea two days ago I felt into life. I was so freaking happy and deeply satisfied. ⁣

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I no longer have 10 year plans. I do however know how to connect with my life force, my soul, and with spirit guides (including my dad). Somehow that last day with my dad I think I gave him a promise to be true to my soul and listen to what she truly desires. ⁣

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The last phase for my grief is accepting the truth of my soul and move with the changes of life. ⁣

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I’m here to fully live it and I don’t hold back. ⁣

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That to me feels like how I can honor my dad’s legacy best.

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Love is Love

Elisabeth — Sun, 10 Jul 2022 22:45:40 +0000

I’m pretty sure most of the people that matter to me have been aware of my somewhat unusual relationship status and how happy it makes me to be able not having to choose one love over the other ❤️

This holiday I experience how everything is coming together with so much grace.

And I like to share a bit about it, because I know there are so many beautiful and unusual relationships out there that can serve as a reminder. It’s not always the circumstances that are ‘perfect’ – but when people truly celebrate each other’s life’s and soul expansion? That can create the deepest happiness – and that’s what I like to share!

Every relationship has its challenges, but for a long time – more than 20 years or so, I thought I did well to stay within a very traditional setting.

When my husband told me he felt more gay than bi or straight, and needed to claim that part of himself in order to live his full expression 3,5 years ago, we both got it.

Thing’s needed to change

For the both of us.

Not easy, but we have always valued each other’s authenticity. We believed in the happiness that being able to live a soul expanded, fulfilled life, can bring.

Truth be told, I never married him because I thought it was fulfilling a romantic need. I didn’t need a marriage for that.

But what I absolutely wanted was to follow and be part of his life as the person I found immensely interesting. I wanted him to be there to follow and be in my life as well.

It was always more about this deep loving friendship and about parenting the two most amazing children in the world.

So when all the traditional structures changed altogether, we stayed together because we both didn’t want to divorce- but in a sense, we also went our own way.

That did brought up every imaginable fear and shadow part.

We held each other’s hands facing it.

But more than that, it brought a whole new outlook on what love meant.

There where adjustments, really having to learn to communicate, and most of all: becoming honest to ourselves.

Self love being the key to it all.

We wanted different things out of life. And that meant seeing what worked together and what not.

It opened space for me to get clear and see how it was completely okay to built a truthful, joyful, energized life based on what made ME tick – without having to let go of this man that is still truly one of the most important people in my life!

The getting clear part was so interesting, I gave myself space to not know and had an amazing time to get to rediscover myself and tell about my discoveries with my best friend at home.

In December 2020 I felt it was time to become clear about what I wanted out of a romantic soulmate.

With my Theta Healing skills I created a very clear and honest picture of the romantic Soulmate I wanted to invite in my life, and also included what I could be (and what not) as a Soulmate for that person.

I set that intention after the New Years intention, second week of January. Before February Ivan and I got together.

He was completely and utterly different than I expected, and also completely 100% aligned with everything I asked the creator during my Theta session I had done with myself.

And now we have landed here.1,5 years later.

We are on a holiday and every time when we see something beautiful in the lakes and waterfalls I film it for Albert and I send it to him via WhatsApp.

We talk on the phone and I am really happy he has time to go of for a few days and be on his own on one of the Dutch Isles.

My beloved Ivan completely gets it and even points out the little streams for Albert.

This amazing richness of having my soul enriching platonic loving relationship with my husband- and my completely deeply satisfying romantic, artistically inviting relationship with my beloved is beyond anything I could have imagined possible.

Believe me, it is not something I would advise for many people. But love IS love. In whatever form.

When it feels like the truth of who we are, when it is able to fill the needs and desires we really long for, and it doesn’t hurt those we love… there is more possible than the happy ever after Disney version of relationships and STILL have that crazy happy smile on your face when you’re over 50 years old 🥰🔥❤️😊

I have been asked several times if I offer the finding and calling in your Soulmate Theta Healing for clients. And the answer is a “hell yes!”

It is such an amazing activity to discover who you are in alignment with, and create a clear and powerful intent so that Source is able to bring it to you. Just set up a short call and we can arrange a Theta Healing session together.

xx Elisabeth

The post Love is Love first appeared on Elisabeth de Charon de Saint Germain.

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Stages of grief & lust for life